Bringing you the very latest on... Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross

Before I start detailing what has been happening to Ross and Russell, I just thought I'd let you know that the BBC's website have a clear and handy timeline of their actions from the minute the whole fiasco started.

You can see this here. I would attempt to copy it but this is the BBC we are talking about and I don't fancy becoming the next Ross/Brandesque victim...

On Wednesday, Jonathan Ross was informally suspended. Yesterday at exactly 1821 GMT he was then officially suspended from the BBC for 12 weeks without pay.

Oh boo hoo, poor Rossy. How ever is his £6 million annual salary going to cope? I don't think this is nearly enough if they are actually trying to punish Ross accordingly.

Do bear in mind though that I am a poor student journalist so that my view on that issue may be a tad biased.

Last year Ross envoked rage in the BBC's senoirs' department when he joked that his £6 million yearly salary

Ross provoked fury among the BBC's senior management by joking during last year's show that his £6 million annual salary was "worth 1,000 BBC journalists". Hysterical I'm sure.

And what about Russell?

And what about Russell indeed. On Wednesday evening this 'party animal' announced that he is going to quit his Saturday BBC radio show. I can't claim to care as I never listened to it anyway.

I also don't quite understand why the press keep referring to Russell as a 'party animal'. Yes he goes out and enjoys a good time but it stops there.

After reading his autobiography 'My booky wook' I learned that the celebrity is completely teetotal. Yes, yes we all know he was a heroin addict and he is now in recovery.

But what most don't know and his book reveals is that he has been clean for almost five years. And by clean I mean of everything. Not just from heroin, but from all drugs, including the liquid form of alcohol.

Most people would not view alcohol as a drug, but for a recovering addict such as Russell, a return to drinking could conlcude in disastrous consequences.

In the link mentioned above The Daily Mail discuss the fact that Russell has been out till 3am. He is pictured passing round a bottle of alcohol.

Now if you look closely you may too realise that the bottle of so-called alcohol is actually just a bottle of Hildon water.

I know this because I always drink this brand of water. Honestly, I should be a detective!

And back to the point

Both Jonathan Ross and Russell Brand have now both publicly apologised, as have the BBC. If not with a little, or a lot, of delay.

Please see Russell's apology below:



Unfortunately though, this heartfelt apology came a little too late for one crusty cranky old man. Yes that's right, Gordon Brown publicly called the whole incident "clearly inappropriate and unacceptable".

Quite why the most prominent political figure in the country decided to involve himself is inexplicable. I am sure there are better things Gordon should be doing with his time as Prime Minister than commenting on big-haired lunatics.